I Keep Waffling on This

But this thing with RA’s interviews and the incessant questioning and teasing about the Army he receives and the thought we’ll have to hear that crap again just won’t leave me alone. I really really don’t want to hear it again, and even though I’m not big on sending him a fan letter myself, I was wondering if maybe I could steal Nat’s idea of a group fan letter. Not exactly like hers. That is unique and special, and I don’t want to duplicate it at all but merely the idea of several people sending a letter together. Really I’m not even thinking of a letter but of something like a petition in the form of military orders where we tell him we don’t want to hear about the Army again! and he’s not allowed to talk about it! LOL!

It could be from the Armitage Army (Rogue Branch), and maybe we can attach our names (real, internet, whatever name you want as long as it’s not vulgar) and have some ranks listed beside them. Maybe you could also list your country and we can make this an international order. Not sure what group I would pattern that after. But there’s only one problem for me. I don’t know what orders look or sound like. Well, now that I think of it I guess it doesn’t have to be anything really authentic looking. See that’s my anal side. Gotta nitpick stuff. I don’t want to nitpick this but rather have a good time with it. If you have any ideas, bring ’em on. Comment or send me an email. You can click on the link on the left sidebar near the bottom labeled “Contact me” if you want to email; otherwise, comment away.

Screencap courtesy of my stash. This one’s for you, Elvira. I know you love that beanie.

41 Comments

  1. I am sure that orders are different in the British Army than they are in the U.S. anyway. Like when JP’s superior said to him in the first part of SB 1, “hat off.” Is that like “at ease”?

    Like you, I waffle. I’ll think about it some more and see if I come to any conclusions. If you do write, though, I would sign it with my blog address and my real name.

  2. I knew as soon as I posted that I would start getting an idea. I would have waited until it was more formed, but I knew I would get cold feet and not do it at all.

    Perhaps there could be some verbiage ala instructions about Fight Club. Here’s the original quote:

    “The first rule of Fight Club is: you do not talk about Fight Club. The second rule of Fight Club is: you DO NOT talk about Fight Club! Third rule of Fight Club: if someone yells “stop!”, goes limp, or taps out, the fight is over. Fourth rule: only two guys to a fight. Fifth rule: one fight at a time, fellas. Sixth rule: the fights are bare knuckle. No shirt, no shoes, no weapons. Seventh rule: fights will go on as long as they have to. And the eighth and final rule: if this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight. ”

    I just give that as food for thought or maybe it should be scrapped altogether, but since I”m having fun I’m letting you guys in on how my head works — maybe a little more than I have already. LOL!

    BTW, Fight Club is one of my favorite movies.

  3. @Servetus,

    We must have posted almost simultaneously. I will probably break down and sign my real name, but with the proviso he cannot reveal it. Whatever the case, I just want this to be lighthearted with the clear message that WE DON’T WANT TO HEAR ANYMORE ABOUT US, THE FANS.

  4. Never seen it. I agree that humorous (humourous? my spelling is going to heck with all this British newspaper reading) is the way to go, though.

  5. Jinx!

  6. No, no, don’t say that. LOL!!

    If I can get past my cold medicine, I may set up a page for this with a mock up and people can sign it. That may just be the medicine talking. We’ll see. :D

  7. OK, unjinx!

  8. :D

  9. Joint fan letter – not bad at alll! Don’t mind having e-address/real name there, for the sake of bona fides, only as long as it is not publicly revealed.

    Humourous, or humorous. Strength of English language is its evolution, and acceptance of change. I generally stick to British spelling, as that’s what I grew up with. But in Canada, U.S. spelling is fully accepted.

    Good idea about framing it in the form of “orders”, – we can make up our own military jargon.

  10. Rather than “hat off”, I think my command would more likely be “shirt off, soldier!”. Best not put that in any joint letter. RA might think that he’s been invaded by the pants-throwing brigade, Rogue section of the AA and march off, sharpish!

  11. If someone wants to use their real name, feel free,but you do not have to do that at all. I will put my real name on it so that he doesn’t think we’re complete nuts. Maybe just partial nuts. :D

  12. LOL, MillyMe!

  13. @MillyMe, Maybe we can tell him that should we ever send him on special ops assignment, we’ll communicate via pants on the window so as not to draw attention.

  14. Wait. How about if he breaks orders, there will be more pants on the window. MUHAHAHAHA

  15. Unless he keeps his mouth shut, we will all send him our pants and embarrass him even more? That would be fine with me, with my American understanding of pants. I’ve got some wornout jeans I could send him with a message embroidered on the legs or something. I would never send anyone my underwear, not even someone with whom I was actually intimate. I am astounded that people do it.

  16. LOL, This could be the start of a compilation of seriously warped orders from Rogue Section. We would need to work undercover, of course. Perhaps Lucas and MI-5 could be of assistance?

  17. @Servetus, LOVE IT! Just the threat of it would be enough, and yeah, I’m with you. Why in God’s name would anyone send their underwear? Or any underwear? Ick.

    @ MillyMe,

    Perhaps we can appeal to his Lucas alter-ego to keep things underwraps.

  18. LOL this is HILARIOUS. OK I’ll sign! I’ll see if I can come up with any iceas… hahahaha

  19. When I read this different thoughts went through my mind:

    RA has no fault that lazy journalist don’t can come up with better questions that army-related, so the letter ordering (lol) to stop it, should be addressed to them. How would be sign that hypothetical letter? I don’t know if all the fans consider themselves among the army (I do) and I don’t believe the AA is a group to say ‘yes you are, no you’re not, out’, but since this doesn’t come from their official page…

    I think it’ll be a lot of fun to write this letter as with orders to RA about fans, more like servetus’ blog discussion, even if they look like orders, they’re actually suggestions from us. Plus, if we make it funny/witty RA might understand that we are as annoyed with those questions as he is and that knowing is not his fault, we take it on stride or at least we don’t blame him nor feel offended by *him*…these journalist are another matter….

    Just my 2 cents.

    @milly I laugh just to imagine what order could Ros give RA to deal with that question ;)

  20. Underwear – YEW!

    But love the “undercover” ; NOT underwear MI5 cover story for the letter. So, on to a joint Black Ops scenario here… Hmmn, could we co-opt Connie, the mistress of “undercover”? Maybe not. Ben?

  21. I love the black ops!

  22. So far I have AA selecting him for a black op, which may or may not include Connie or Ben or Ros or Harry, and certainly the nature of it means he cannot talk about it. But what will be the black op? I’m thinking something multi-pronged. LOL!

  23. Re: Black Op; Is it time to get the Chinese in here? Stealing into the City/NYSE etc. computer systems and mucking them up, in order to promote Chinese economic hegemony?

    Just a thought, as there has been little reference to China so far. And it might just the next Big Thing…(after all the other “little” things….

  24. ROFLOL at all the comments especially MillyMe! (Almost fell of the stadium seating) those are the best orders. I’ll sign even if I am not as bothered about the fan questions. I am not an Army girl but this one I happily belong to. But really it suits me better to go rogue!

  25. Hi I previously posted on your blog as the The Gruffalo but am getting fed up of having purple prickles all over my back.

    Anyway some comments on this:

    Don’t you think that using a military form of address is just perpetuating the Army thing?

    Should we really object to / mention the reference to Armitage Army since it is an established name for some RA fan groups (to which I do belong myself)? It’s really just questioning about fans in general that should be challenged, surely?

    Agree it’s the journalists that we should be addressing mainly. But a letter to individuals would never reach the next one to do an interview with him. What about instead asking/encouraging RA forums/websites etc to include a ‘For attention of the Press section’ on their home pages (someone think of a better name) which gives out some messages from the fans/fandom. Obviously they could ignore that or never find it, but I think that many must have a quick look at fansites etc when they write an article about him.

    I am sure Richard would already be glad to never answer another question about his fans again, but he is a polite man and will always say something in response to the same old twaddle – after all he’s no Russell Crowe! (thank goodness).

  26. I am intrigued by the idea of statements on websites. It would certainly have the advantage of everyone being allowed to say exactly how they feel about the question. I’ve been thinking of doing a post with a title like “interviewers’ questions for Richard Armitage” in hopes a journalist would see it and ask some intelligent questions. Of course that would I mean I’d have to give up my day dream of interviewing Mr. Armitage myself.

  27. @Kaprekar,

    You make some good points. Here’s my thoughts on each:

    1. Since he or “his people” would be the only ones seeing the letter, I don’t think it would perpetuate anything with the press. Hopefully, he would get a chuckle out of it if nothing else.

    2. That’s why it would be from the rogue branch or division, so it would be clear we don’t necessarily represent everyone, and we could even make the statement that we don’t represent any particular website. Plus, I really think the references to the Armitage Army have long since transcended a particular website. It may have been that way in the beginning, but when an interviewer is addressing RA, it’s clear they are really referring to his fans in general, who as you may know are not all part of a particular website.

    3. Even if a letter did reach the next individual to interview him, that would just give them more fodder to know the Army/fans are so involved as to presume to instruct an interviewer. Phew. That would definitely be the wrong move.

    4. I had a discussion on AA and C19 a year or so ago about this very subject of those sites taking the bull by the horns, as it were, and trying to present something to the press. I didn’t go into particulars, but it was met with apathy. So I don’t think that would work. Plus, the reputation of the journalists being lazy is not conducive to them reading something like that anyway, and if they’re not lazy, I’m not so sure they don’t want to surf around for themselves, i.e., take an accounting of the fans themselves instead of someone doing it for them.

    5. The beauty of this letter is he does not have to heed it at all. He’ s certainly free to do what he wants with regard to fans. Again, hopefully he’ll just get a chuckle AND yes, he’ll realize beyond doubt that there are some fans who don’t want to hear it.

    6. Much as I like Russell Crowe’s acting (and he’s one of my favorite actors; not people but actors), he’s no Richard Armitage. :D

  28. 3 is a good point. Although, since we are having this discussion in the first place, we are involved enough to want to instruct interviewers anyway …

  29. Actually, the bottom line, for me anyway, is to make it a jest, and if something is taken seriously by RA, well, hey, that’s his business.

  30. agree that the humorous aspect is important and that it would be harder to accomplish that with instructions to the press.

  31. Fight Club is also one of my very favourite movies ever. I was quite obsessed with it for a while. I even read the book.

    Yeah I like Russell Crowe’s acting too. In fact I watched Gladiator only last night.

    I understand about the apathy of website owners about statements directed to the press and if that is the way it is, then fine…though I was thinking that it would only need to be done by 3 or 4 websites. Of course it could also provoke a journalist into exactly the opposite of what we want ie encourage them to write about his fans.

    But I am afraid I have my doubts about a missive addressed to Mr A himself on this topic. I don’t think he needs to be told this! He is clearly seriously embarrassed by the questioning already but he still answers politely or deflects cleverly depending on the situation / interviewer etc. I can’t see that changing. And anything we send him is basically just another fan letter. Journalists will continue to ask him the same questions no matter what we write until there is no more mileage to wring out of the story. And I can’t see either him or his agents attempting to suggest that journalists cannot ask certain questions.

  32. It’s just a joke, and hey, maybe he’ll use the line as a crack. That’s all there is to this. It’s supposed to be fun and not serious at all. But it would be a nice perk if he really used it as a comeback. For all the journalists know he made it up on the fly and not that anyone actually made a suggestion. If he’s a smart boy, and I think he is, that’s how he would play it if he said it.

    BTW, actors/agents suggest and sometimes outright demand that journalists cannot ask certain questions all the time. It’s not out of the realm of possibility except RA is not a big enough celebrity to do that, and maybe he never should be. No, it’s better to make it something funny and move on.

  33. kaprekar, I had the same concerns that you’ve expressed, reading RAFrenzy’s answers I think the key is the angle in which this letter would be written.

    This will be fan letter, as RAFrenzy posted webs are not much interested in making a statement for journalist to stop the silly question and sadly is very likely interviewers might not liked it and, God forbid, tease RA even more.
    Maybe just to keep it safe, that this is just to make him laugh and (if I’m not mistaken) to show him our ‘support’, that we’re as uncomfortable/tired/bothered with this question should be stated clearly from the beginning (I know he is intelligent, as I said is to keep it safe).

    I think this would be like Anonymous comment on Nat’s fan letter, she doesn’t mean to tell RA what to say or not to say, it just is humorous and indirectly says what she’s read in his interviews has made him more endearing to her and all of us :P

    If we manage to keep the letter in good fun I think we should not make anyone uncomfortable.
    I feel too that the name of AA even if there is a site and was created as a group is a name popularly recognized that involves whoever considers herself a follower, not considering what site they are or not part of. On the other hand I also agree that it’ll be best not to use it, maybe just say we’re a group of fans that daily join this blog.

  34. The letter definitely has to be in good fun. It should not sound serious at all but yet convey to him that we understand. I’m working on something now, and when I feel it has the right tenor, I’ll post and get your input.

    Actually, this “letter” is probably only going to be about two to three sentences if it’s constructed correctly. That’s what I’m shooting for anyway.

  35. Brevity is the soul of wit, right? Maybe you could write it in haiku :)

  36. Or make that “International group of fans”. If you wish. Would it add a little more resonance? Just a suggestion….

  37. A “rogue branch” …lol. I like the idea! :)

  38. An “international rogue branch”. Or does that sound like conspiracy stuff? That’s OK, I like spy stories and conspiracy stuff, as long as we don’t take them too seriously…

    Love “rogue branch”, by the way!

  39. The more it sounds like a conspiracy, the better. ;-) LOL!

  40. Yup, my imagination can even (just) embrace Dan Brown. (Pity he isn’t a better, more literate, writer; hope I haven’t offended here..). And loved Alice the “Chalice”! :)

    And Bourne Conspriacies, and all the rest.

  41. The thing about Dan Brown is that there is a hook at the end of every chapter. The history is lousy, the prose style bites, the story is implausible … but at the end of every chapter there is something that makes me keep reading.


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