While I’m Being So Blunt, Some Further Thoughts or Oh the Places You’ll Go II

Are you in need of some mirth? No, make that belly laughs to the point of almost being sick (yes, I’m being serious about this — when I’m not laughing so hard I literally — yes, I mean actually — can’t type), then visit a certain gay gossip site.

Over the course of this blog’s life and especially in the last couple of weeks, I’ve had people send me notes in regard to that site, and they go something like this, “Unreal what they say over there,” or “I can’t believe what I read,” or “They’re nuts.” And aren’t we glad? I know I am.

Whenever I’ve gone to that site, I’ve laughed my ass off. Actually, I wish it could make me laugh my ass off and then I would happily pay them a fortune. All I know is I’m laughing so hard that it ought to do something earth shaking. But usually it just makes my family wonder what drug I’ve taken. The other night I was laughing hysterically, and SO, who was on the other side of the house, finally yelled, “What’s so funny?!” I was literally (damn there’s that word again) almost busting a gut, and there were tears in my eyes, and I was just rolling around with every nerve ending on my body being tickled. When I heard that question, I began to compose myself, and it did feel like coming off of a high. Once I was calmed down enough to think straight, I thought, “I need to go to that site more often ’cause it’s way better than any nitrous oxide.”

And the thread which put me over the top?

Stars no one thinks are gay but you

When I started reading, I was thinking, yeah, that person seems gay. Uh huh, yeah that person too. Oh yeah, definitely that person. But then I see this:

Vince Vaughn

Nah, I’m not feelin’ that one.

Then further down:

Jimmy Stewart

No, I don’t think so.

Then a gimme:

George Bush

Moving on from the wiseass, I read:

Harrison Ford

No way! UNLESS Harrison Ford really can act!

I start to giggle on that one.

I read on:

Jerry Seinfeld

Yeah, this I can see. Not because Jerry is gay but because he doesn’t seem like a guy who wants to be crossways with anyone, so he may even love being on the list. I can hear Jerry now, “When I’m gay, these are things I do……, but I’m not gay — at least not today. Catch me tomorrow.”

wenn5438451__oPt

I started to have a deeper throated chuckle at this point, and then it started to get serious:

Jim Henson

The poster thought he really died of aids.

Another poster agreed.

Someone took exception:

It was pneumonia, bitches.

(No, I’m not making this up.)

Anyway, I’m trying not to belly laugh at this point — no offense to Jim Henson’s memory.

Then someone really got into the spirit of the topic and posted this:

Julie Andrews

Martha Stewart

Ronald Reagan

Carol Burnett

Troy Aikman

Christopher Reeves

That’s when I fell off the bed laughing. SO was concerned and wanted to see what I was reading. Then he started laughing too and we ended up comprising our own list of those who no one thinks are gay “but you.” So glad for the “but you.” There’s some sort of comfort in it.

Okay, so maybe there is a question mark about Christopher Reeves.

If you decide to make your own list, there is a proviso. It must include someone worth being on the list. Let me put a fine point on that, if a person is good looking or extremely charismatic or highly successful, they are gay. If someone is ugly or a loser, they are straight mother f*ckers. ;-) Yeah, I’m puttin’ that wink there for the people who have no humor.

I gotta go back to that site. May have to make another visit today. I need something to take away the bad taste of that hellaciously long meeting from yesterday (yes, it’s still with me and impacting my schedule today), and a bunch of mouthy queens might do the trick.

For those guys at the gossip site, love ya, and hope you don’t mind this “frau” having a chuckle or two at your expense. Hey, we’re all anonymous, so it shouldn’t matter. :D

note: new tag – Oh the places you’ll go. I should have done that tag a long time ago! Need to go back and tag some old posts with that one.

7 Comments

  1. I always remember Michael Gambon saying to a reporter that he used to be gay but he gave it up as it was too sore! The reporter scribbled it all down to the amazement of Sir Michael, he thought it was obvious he was making it up.

  2. People are sometimes so in need to hear something, or see something, or believe something, that it renders them stupid.

    I was being very honest that I get belly laughs from that site. I ALWAYS laugh pretty hard when I go there.

  3. I think they ship Christopher Reeve and Steve Reeves as one “Super” couple! LOL.

  4. Just don’t click the “offsite links” – some stuff you just cannot un-see.

  5. Not that there’s anything wrong with that … As Jerry Seinfeld would say.

  6. If it’s the place I think it is, you’ll also find Clark Gable, Tiger Woods and probably JayZ.

  7. That’s my go-to site for a shot of humor too! I particularly enjoy random references to Bea Arthur and Abe Vigoda. They show up on the strangest threads. It’s been a while since I read the “no one but you” thread, but I’ll bet one of them is on it or will be at some point.


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